Jose

Pretend it’s not me, tonight
Although I take up this physical space
On the couch
Or in front of the freezer
Just one more time
Or maybe another
Pretend it’s not me, Jose

Pretend I am a colleague, tonight
And it is Friday night
And we have worked diligently this week
And we meet at a bar
And after we meet you
We are at peace

Pretend it is not me, alone
Thinking about her
Knowing that to make it through
The next couple hours
I need you to put me to sleep

I feel you, already
And you have not helped at all
Because when I write this
I feel her more
Than I feel you
I feel a slight burn in my chest
As I say, “Sorry, life”
Because I should be running
Away from her, away from the old
But instead I meet you quickly
And you look like her
You taste like her
The salty tears of my eyes are you
They are her
Memories of her running down my cheeks
Wanting her for a couple more weeks
So I can plead my case for us

I feel you, now
Your frozen curves in my hand
A bottle to take me to another land
But instead
Jose takes me back to you

So tonight
I say, “Sorry, Life”
Not, “I know not what I do,”
But “I naught know what to do”
Because Jose…equals you